How to cure Carlos-itis

Fellow Blogger Dan Steinberg wrote a blog yesterday about Carlos Rogers's Hands and why he can't catch a pass to save his life or our season. In the article Rogers and Smoot are both questioned as to why they have horrible hands and coach Zorn interjected his opinion as to what Carlos needs to do to fix the problem. Below are Zorn's comments from Steinberg's Blog.

Zorn: "...I don't think the ball machine's necessarily the answer....For him, he hasn't connected the idea of making the play and getting great position with just putting his hands up. Some guys can do it more naturally, [Rogers] seems to be a guy that has to concentrate, and so he has to become comfortable with that. And I think QB's throwing him the ball with the kind of velocity they throw it will help, because that's the real issue right there is the ball's coming in fast. Even if a ball machine is throwing it, it's always one speed, it's always in the same spot, and that never happens in the game. So that's really what I'm looking for, is other guys throwing him the ball."

Apparently Carlos needs QB's to throw him the ball at different speeds so he can learn how to catch. Now I'm not a head coach but that makes no sense to me. If you see a ball coming at you regardless of the speed you are either going to catch it or not. If Brett Favre throws a ball to his receivers in practice and then Kellen Clemens throws the same receivers a pass they should be able to catch both of them regardless of the QB's arm strength and speed of the ball. The fact of the matter is Carlos is a DB for a reason and if he could catch he would be a WR.

Cowboy JOTD 09-08-08

I'm finally back from NYC and I'll update the Blog shortly with pics from my trip and my opinion on Zorn and the team. In the mean time, here's another joke about that Broke Back team in Texas.

Joke:

Little Johnny was in his Kindergarten class when the teacher asked the children what their fathers did for a living. All the typical answers came up - fireman, policeman, salesman.Johnny was being uncharacteristically quiet, and so the teacher asked him about his father."My father's an exotic dancer in a gay cabaret and takes off all his clothes in front of other men."The teacher hurriedly set the other children to work on some coloring in and took little Johnny aside to ask him..."Is that really true about your father working in a gay strip club?""No" said Johnny, "he really plays for the Dallas Cowboys but I was too embarrassed to say."

Cowboy JOTD 9-05-08

I figured you guys might need a laugh after that piss poor performance last night.

Three cowboys fans were on their way home after watching their team lose another game. On the way, they came across a sheep with it's head stuck in a fence. one man said, "Man, I'm gonna get some of this."

He began to screw the sheep. He asked if his friend wanted to get some, and he said yes, and he started screwing it. After he got done, he asked the other friend if he wanted some.

The third friend said sure and stuck his head in the fence.

Still Behind Enemy Lines

I'm still up here in NY trying to pretend last night didn't happen. Most of you will be happy to know that I wasn't arrested last night but I did get into a fight outside the bathroom with a retarded Giants fan at Half Time.

I have some pics and stories from the game that I will upload later.

It's only week one and we have 15 more games to go.

Keep the Faith and HTTR

Taylor still on the mind of Redskins

This is an awesome article written by Michael Silver of Yahoo sports on Sean Taylor and how guys on the team still remember him.

It's a must read

Click Here for the Article

Moss displays the “Deuce-One” after scoring a TD
against the Seahawks in the playoffs.
(AP Photo/ John Froschauer)

In Enemy Territory till Sept 6

FdaCowboys will have limited postings until Saturday.

I'm going to NY tomorrow for the game and I'm not sure if I'll have internet access up there. If for some reason I get locked up for beating down a Giants fan a post will be made by a 3rd party with information for my paypal account so you guys can help me with Bail.

I hate the Giants the least out of the NFC teams but I will still stab a Bama that talks bad about my team.

HTTR

Cowboy JOTD 09-03-08

Q. A smart Redskin fan, a very smart Cowboy fan, Santa Claus, and the Easter bunny sit in 4 corners of a square room. In the center is a pot of gold. A bell rings, and they all take off for the pot. Who gets it?

A. The Redskin fan... cause there's no such thing as Santa Claus, there's no such thing as the Easter Bunny and there's no such thing as a smart Cowboy fan!

Changing of the Tackle

Jon "The Rock" Jansen, the longest tenured Washington Redskin has recently lost his starting job to second year player undrafted free agent Stephon Heyer. Jansen has been battling various injuries since 2004 where he ruptured his Achilles tendon in the HOF game. He came back the next year and broke both of his thumbs but was able to somehow still play. Last year during the season opener Jansen dislocated his ankle (see picture below) and was placed on IR after.

"The Rock" has apparently crumbled over the years and Jansen will now be a utility backup playing both Guard and Tackle. The only thing that worries me about that decision is that Jansen has never taken a snap at Guard. We still have Fabini if 32 year old Randy Thomas or 35 year old Pete Kendall go down but the fact of the matter is the "Dirtbags" are getting old fast. We should have drafted some lineman this past year instead of 3 WR's but thats a blog for another day.

Heyer has a lot of potential and he played well last year against some of the leagues premier pass rushers (Osi Umenyora and Michael Strahan). He unfortunately couldn't produce during the most important game of his NFL career against Patrick Kerney, Darryl Tapp and the Seattle Seahawks. I truly believe the kid is a diamond in the rough but this years Stephon hasn't played like last years Stephon. I understand Heyer was hurt in the HOF game against the Colts and he's been nursing a strained knee but the preseason is over and the games count now. If any Coach out there can maximize Heyer's potential it's Coach Buges.

I doubt the coaching staff reads my blog but if any of you read my previous 47-3 post after the Panthers game you know how I currently feel about our line. I have faith in Bugel and the guys to get their act together and buckle down now that play time is over. We have a tough opening schedule this year and if the guys can't give Campbell some time to throw it's going to be a long year.

Cowboy JOTD 09-02-08

A Skins fan, a Cowboys fan, a Giants fan and an Eagles fan were all mountain climbing together one day. As they were climbing up the mountain, they were jawing back and forth with each other over whose team was the best. When they finally reach the top of the mountain, all four are standing around when the Giants fan inexplicably says "This one is for the Giants" and jumps off the mountain. The Eagles fan, not wanting to be out done, says this one is for the Eagles," and jumps off the mountain. The Redskins fan then says "This one is for everybody" and pushes the Cowboys fan of the cliff.

I miss Ade Jimoh!

I never thought the day would come where I would ever say these 4 words.

"I miss Ade Jimoh"

If you were a Skins fan from 2003 - 2005 you know who Ade Jimoh is and how bad he was at CB. The only reason he ever made the team was because he was good on special teams.

I would kill to have Ade back if we can get rid of Justin Tryon. I was at the game last night and our D played like crap. We couldn't generate any kind of pass rush upfront. If it was 3rd and long all the Jaguars did was throw to who ever Tryon was covering and it was a guaranteed 1st down. I understand he is a rookie and he was playing against some Veteran WRs but Tryon got beat like he stole something.

SI.com rates each player in the draft and their Negatives on Tryon were that he was "Not a physically strong defensive back and loses out to large receivers. Struggles making plays with his back to the ball." I understand that one of the main reason we drafted Tryon was because he was a Track Superstar but those skills don't always translate to the field.

The NFL is a copycat league and everyone is drafting bigger taller receivers after they saw what Plexiglass did for the Giants. Tryon is only 5'9 and I don't think he's going to go through another growth spurt anytime soon. If this kid doesn't show a dramatic improvement I say we cut his ass and see if we can get Ade back from the Patriots.

Cowboy JOTD 08-29-08

Last nights game was horrible and if your anything like me you want to punch a Cowboy fan in the face right now. This joke might make you feel a little better until you can find a Cowboy fan to knock out.

So a blind man goes into a bar, he orders a drink, and after a while of sitting in the silence he leans over to the bartender and says "Hey, would you like to hear a Dallas Cowboy joke?" Unbeknownst to the blind man he's actually in a Cowboys themed bar! The man next to him goes "Fella, before you tell that joke you ought to know that the bartender is a Cowboys fan, the bouncer is a Cowboys fan, and I'm a 6-5 260 Cowboys fan... what's more is that the man on your right is a Cowboys fan with a black belt in karate and the man to my left is a Cowboys fan who's a pro wrestler... so think about it real carefully fella, you still wanna tell that Cowboys joke?"The blind man says:"No, not if I'm going to have to explain it 5 times."

It could have been worse...

It could have been worse, we could be the Giants. The only saving grace from last Saturday night's game is that Jason Taylor is only supposed to be out for 10-14 days. I'm just glad he didn't end up like Osi Umenyiora.

I understand Taylor has a consecutive game streak of 130 starts but what's more important? The record or your team?
The record for most consecutive games streak is 270 by Jim Marshall. Taylor isn't even close to breaking that record and we have 15+ games to worry about after the Giants (yes I said 15+). I just hope the training staff doesn't pull another Lavar and bring him back to soon and he gets hurt even worse or that Taylor doesn't try and keep this meaningless stat alive

47-3?

WTF happened?

I apologize for not writing about this sooner but I was hoping this past weekends game was a nightmare and it didn't really happen. I'm a homer and I love my team to a fault at times but I honestly think we have the talent to be a Superbowl Contender and but last Sat's game has made me question this teams heart.

I know it's just preseason and it doesn't count but Saturday nights game was a debacle. I almost wish I had drowned in the Shenandoah River Saturday on my god awful tubing trip just so I would have had an excuse for missing the game.

We were 3-0 coming into that game and we're still 3-1 but the fact of the matter is the 1st team didn't show up. The Offensive line was horrible and they didn't give Jason any time to throw the ball. The Defense couldn't get any pressure on Delhomme and when we blitzed a LB or a CB they would get their to late. It made being a Redskin fan downright embarrassing.

Campbell apparently held onto the ball to long but I find that somewhat hard to believe considering he didn't have any time to throw the ball. The Rockettes would have done a better job blocking for Jason then the "Dirtbags" did. I don't understand how a Joe Bugel coached group could have played that horrible. Jansen has looked like a revolving door most of the preseason and now he's hurt again. I love Jansen and he's one of the "Core Redskins" but if he plays like this in the regular season Campbell is going to get destroyed.

I don't know if the whole team was hungover from Friday night or if the plane got in late but they all looked flat. It seemed like the team gave up and half-assed it after Jason Taylor went down hoping the same thing wouldn't happen to them.

Preseason is a joke and it doesn't matter but you have to at least play with some kind of pride and heart but last Saturday night the Redskins didn't show any at all.

Cowboy JOTD 08-25-08

I figure we could all use a laugh after that debacle of a game on Saturday night.

There's a guy from Washington, DC (Redskins fan) driving from DC to Dallas, and a guy from Dallas (Cowboys fan) driving from Dallas to DC. In the middle of the night with no other cars on the road they hit each other head on and both cars go flying off in different directions. The Redskins fan manages to climb out of his car and surveys the damage. He looks at his twisted car and says, "Man, I am really lucky to be alive!" Likewise the Cowboys fan scrambles out of his car and looks at the wreckage. He too says to himself, "I can't believe I survived this wreck!" The Cowboy fan walks over to the Redskin and says, "Hey man, I think this is a sign from God that we should put away our differences and live as friends instead of arch rivals. The Redskin fan thinks for a moment and says, " You know, you're absolutely right! We should be friends. Now I'm going to see what else survived this wreck." So the Redskins fan pops open his trunk and finds a full unopened bottle of Jack Daniels. He says to the Cowboys fan, "I
think this is another sign from God that we should toast to our newfound
understanding and friendship." The Cowboys fan says, "You're damn right!" and grabs the bottle and starts sucking down Jack Daniels. After putting away nearly half of the bottle the Cowboys fan hands it back to the Redskins fan and says, "Your turn!" The Redskins fan twists the cap back on the bottle and says, "Nahh, I think I'll wait for the cops to show up."

Cowboy JOTD 08-22-08

A boy is wallking near Fed Ex Field when he sees a man being attacked by a viscious dog. He finds a stick and charges the dog without any fear. He gets to the dog, slips the stick through the collar and twists really hard, breaking the dog's neck and saving the man's life. A news reporter for the Washington Post was close by and witnessed the whole event. He rushes over to the hero and tells him he wants to put this in the paper with the head line: "Redskins Fan Saves Man from Imminent Death"The boy replies "I am not a Redskins fan." Perplexed, the reporter asks "what kind of fan are you?" The boy replies " A Cowboy fan!" The reporter decides on another headline: "Ignorant Redneck Ba$tard Kills Family Pet."

US Olympic Relay Team catches Carlositis

I don't want it. Don't give it to me.



Damn you Carlos Rogers, DAMN YOU!





Carlositis


-noun (car-los-ite-des)

1. The inability to hold onto to an object due to fear of success


2. The inability to catch a football even if it was thrown by a 5 year old girl standing 2 feet away from you and it hits you in the chest.

Example: Dallas QB Tony Romo has been apparently diagnosed with Carlositis after he was unable to handle a simple snap that hit him in the head.

It's spreading!!!

The American men and the American women relay team both dropped the ball um I mean baton last night in Beijing. Darvis Patton and Tyson Gay of the US Mens relay team were unable to connect on the exchange in the 400- meter relay. The men were on the last pass of the preliminaries and couldn't complete the simple hand off. Later that evening Torri Edwards and Lauryn Williams of the Women's relay team also fumbled the Baton in the 4 x 100m relay.

Williams said, "If people want to assess the blame to me, that's OK ... I mean, I can take whatever it is that people are going to dish out... She was there. I don't know what happened"

Lauryn, the answer is simple. You've contracted a severe case of Carlositis. Carlositis arises at the most inopportune moments, see Redskins vs Seahawks 2005 Divisional Playoff game. Carlositis apparently keeps you and your team, if applicable, from succeeding whether it be in the Olympics or vs a Divisional opponent in the Playoffs.

I'm not sure if Lauryn and Carlos have ever met or if the disease has now become airborne but I've emailed this Blog to a friend at the CDC to make him aware of what's going on. If we find any more cases of Carlositis we'll post them ASAP.

Cowboy JOTD 08-21-08

Two guys from Dallas die and wake up in hell. The devil stops by to check on them and sees them dressed in coats, gloves and earmuffs, warming themselves around the fire. The devil asked them, "What are you two doing? Isn't it hot enough for you?!" The guys reply, "Well, you do realize that we're from Dallas, Texas. After our summers there, this is like a cold wave!" The devil decides that these two guys aren't miserable enough, so he cranks up the heat! The next day, the devil stops by again and there are the two guys again dressed in their coats, gloves and earmuffs. The devil asked them, "It's awfully hot down here! Can't you guys feel that?!" Again the guys answered, "Well, like we told you yesterday, we are from Dallas, Texas. We have suffered through the dog days of a Texas summer. This is like winter down here!"

The devil gets really steamed and he decides to crank up the heat as high as it will go. People are wailing and screaming all over hell. However, when he stops by to check on the two men, he finds them in light jackets, grilling steaks and drinking beer! The devil couldn't believe his eyes. "Everyone down here is in absolute misery! You two seem to be enjoying yourselves!" The two men reply, "Well, as you know, we are from Dallas, Texas. This weather is like a fall morning during football season! So we thought we would have a little tailgate party!" The devil is so mad that he can't see straight! He decides that if the heat doesn't bother these two guys, he will go in the opposite direction. He decides to shut all the heat off in hell! The next day, the temperature is below zero. Icicles are hanging everywhere. People are shivering so bad, they are unable to wail, moan or gnash their teeth! The devil smiled as he went to check on the two Texans. He finds them back in their coats, gloves and earmuffs. They were jumping up and down and cheering! The devil was dumbfounded. "I don't get it! When I turned the heat up, you were happy! Now it's freezing cold, and you are celebrating! What's wrong with you two?" The Texans looked at the devil in surprise. "Well, don't you know? If hell froze over, that must mean that the Cowboys must've got back to the Super Bowl!"